I Told My Friend She Married a Useless Man, and Now She Hates Me

I take it that everyone of us must navigate our own lives and take responsibility for our decisions? However, it is in our nature as humans to want to help friends who are actually in need. However, what would you do if your friend—the one you always stand by—started confiding in you about all of their issues, repeatedly, and with no sign of stopping? This Reddit member is exactly in that predicament. She wondered if she was managing the matter with her buddy correctly, so she looked to the large internet community for advice.

I(32F) am a single mother of two kids (6M and 5m F). I am a single mother by choice (my kids are donor conceived).

I am lucky enough to have a good job (French teacher in a private school), and a paid off house (parents’ life insurance and inheritance).

Before I had either of my kids, I made sure to have a year’s living expenses saved, then I would take a sabbatical to recover from birth, as well as bond with my kids. While on sabbatical, I still tutor some kids for some extra income.

My friend (34F), just had a baby 2 months ago. She is the breadwinner in her household, and her husband has been unemployed since he was laid off during COVID.

It was great to be pregnant at the same time, as well as having a friend with a newborn. But it has turned sour.

She has been saying how jealous she is of me being able to take off a whole year from work, how she would have loved to not worry about losing their home, how she doesn’t even have a couple hundred dollars in her savings account, let alone a whole year’s worth of living expenses….

I usually ignore it, or brush it off, because I kind of can understand the stress she is under.

Well, starting about 10 days ago, she started hinting at not being able to afford daycare, and any mention of her husband taking care of their kid is brushed off. Then she started remarking on how much free time I must have, which I deflected by saying -truthfully- that being a single mom to a baby and a small kid left me no free time actually.

Then last night she came out with it, and asked if I could “do her a favor” and watch her kid while she’s at work. I was firm, but polite, when I said that I couldn’t, that I am not capable of watching two kids under 6 months.

She started almost begging me, saying she can’t afford daycare, and if she is not back at work, she will lose her job, and they will end up homeless. I again brought up her husband, and she said that he was not good with kids, and isn’t capable of taking care of her kid.

I kept saying no, she kept pushing, until it escalated to her calling me heartless, and me telling her that it’s not my problem she chose to have a kid with a useless man.

Now she blocked me, I am feeling very guilty about what I said, and feeling like an AH.

How I Eliminated Age Spots with a Simple Kitchen Ingredient: Baking Soda

Are age spots affecting your self-confidence? Don’t worry—there’s a simple, budget-friendly solution right in your kitchen. The secret weapon? Baking soda, a versatile staple that can do wonders for your skin!

Baking soda, or sodium bicarbonate, is an effective exfoliant that helps slough off dead skin cells, gradually fading age spots over time. Its alkaline properties also aid in balancing your skin’s pH, promoting overall skin health.

Here are two easy ways to use baking soda for lightening age spots:

Method 1: Simple Baking Soda Paste

Ingredients:

• 2 teaspoons of baking soda
• Water (just enough to form a paste)

Instructions:

1. Mix the baking soda with a little water in a bowl until you get a thick paste.
2. Gently apply the paste to your age spots using your fingertips. Avoid excessive scrubbing.
3. Let it sit for about 5 minutes. If you have sensitive skin, limit this to 2-3 minutes.
4. Rinse with lukewarm water and pat your skin dry.
5. Follow up with a moisturizer to keep your skin hydrated.
6. Use this treatment 2-3 times a week, adjusting based on how your skin reacts.

Method 2: Baking Soda and Lemon Juice

Ingredients:

• 2 teaspoons of baking soda
• 1 teaspoon of fresh lemon juice

Instructions:

1. Combine the baking soda and lemon juice in a bowl. A slight fizzing reaction is normal!
2. After the fizzing subsides, gently apply the mixture to the age spots using a cotton swab or your fingers.
3. Leave it on for no more than 5 minutes—lemon juice can make your skin more sensitive to light.
4. Rinse thoroughly with lukewarm water and apply moisturizer.
5. If you’re going outside, be sure to use sunscreen, as lemon juice can heighten your skin’s sensitivity to UV rays.
6. Use this treatment once a week, and keep an eye on how your skin responds.

Important Precautions:

• Always do a patch test before applying a new treatment to a larger area.
• Baking soda can make your skin more sensitive to sunlight, so don’t forget to wear sunscreen.
• Avoid overusing baking soda, as it can strip your skin of essential oils, leading to dryness or irritation.

Using baking soda is an easy and affordable way to address age spots, but results may vary. For more stubborn skin issues or if you’re looking for significant changes, consider consulting a dermatologist. Embrace your skin and take pride in your natural beauty!