Ever noticed how a guy’s appearance seems to completely change once he starts dating? One day, he’s carefree, rocking an untamed beard and a messy hairstyle, and the next, he’s clean-shaven, well-groomed, and looking way too polished.
Why does this transformation happen? Well, the answer is simple—when single, most guys don’t care much about their looks, but when they enter a relationship, suddenly, self-care becomes a priority. Let’s dive into this hilarious shift and break down the ways boys change when they go from single life to dating mode.
1. The Single Life: Carefree and Rugged
Before a guy enters a relationship, personal grooming is often at the bottom of his priority list. When he’s single, there’s no pressure to impress anyone, so he lets his natural state take over.
What Happens When a Guy is Single?
- The Beard Takes Over – Many guys skip shaving for weeks, growing anything from a light stubble to a full-blown caveman beard.
- Messy Hair, Don’t Care – Haircuts? Those are optional. A single guy might go months without trimming his hair, leading to that “I just woke up” look becoming his everyday style.
- Basic Fashion Choices – A single guy’s wardrobe consists of wrinkled t-shirts, faded jeans, and that one hoodie he’s had since high school.
- Skincare? What’s That? – Forget fancy grooming routines. The most skincare a single guy does is splashing water on his face in the morning.
- Minimal Effort in Smelling Good – Deodorant? Sometimes. Cologne? Only for special occasions (which rarely happen).
In short, single guys live life on easy mode, with no pressure to constantly look their best.
2. The Dating Phase: Grooming Overload Begins
Once a guy starts dating, everything changes overnight. Suddenly, self-care becomes a priority, and he transforms into a well-groomed gentleman.
How a Guy Changes When He Starts Dating
- The Beard Disappears – The first thing to go? The rugged, wild beard. He’ll either go for a clean-shaven look or neatly trimmed stubble to impress his girlfriend.
- Haircuts Become a Monthly Ritual – Gone are the days of letting hair grow uncontrollably. Now, he visits the barber regularly to keep his hairstyle fresh.
- Wardrobe Upgrade – His old, baggy t-shirts are replaced with well-fitted shirts, stylish jackets, and trendy sneakers. He suddenly knows what “fashion sense” means.
- Skincare Becomes a Thing – Now, he owns face wash, moisturizer, and maybe even exfoliating scrubs—all because his girlfriend recommended them.
- Cologne and Grooming Essentials – He starts investing in good cologne, deodorants, and even fancy beard oils to keep things fresh.
3. The Psychological Shift – Why Do Boys Change When They Start Dating?
So, why do guys suddenly care so much about their appearance when they start dating? It’s not just about impressing their partner—it’s also about self-confidence and making a good impression.
Why This Transformation Happens:
- First Impressions Matter – In the early stages of dating, guys want to look their best to keep their partner interested and attracted.
- A Girlfriend’s Influence – Let’s be honest—most guys won’t upgrade their grooming routine unless someone encourages them. Girlfriends often introduce better skincare, stylish clothing, and overall self-care tips.
- Boost in Confidence – Looking better makes a guy feel better. When he sees the positive reactions from his partner, he’s more motivated to keep up the effort.
- Fear of Being “That Guy” – Nobody wants to be the scruffy, unkempt boyfriend who looks like he just rolled out of bed. Guys realize that maintaining good grooming habits keeps the relationship fresh and attractive.
4. The Funny Reality – Before vs. After Dating
Let’s compare a guy’s lifestyle before and after he enters a relationship.
| Category | Single Life | Dating Life |
|---|---|---|
| Beard & Hair | Wild, unkempt | Trimmed, stylish |
| Fashion Sense | Basic and lazy | Thoughtful and trendy |
| Skincare Routine | Nonexistent | Uses at least 3 products |
| Cologne & Fragrance | Rarely used | Always smells fresh |
| Gym Routine | “I’ll start next month” | Works out regularly |
| Selfies & Photos | Avoids them | Takes cute couple pictures |
5. When the Relationship Matures – Will He Go Back to Old Habits?
At the beginning of a relationship, effort levels are at their peak. But what happens after months (or years) of dating?
Three Possible Scenarios:
- He Keeps Up the Grooming Routine – Some guys embrace their new self-care habits and continue maintaining their well-groomed look.
- He Relaxes but Stays Presentable – After a while, he might loosen up but still put in effort for special occasions.
- Back to Single Mode – Once he’s comfortable, he stops trying altogether—and the beard, messy hair, and lazy outfits return.
Most long-term relationships find a balance, where a guy maintains some level of effort without going overboard.
6. The Takeaway – Effort Is Key, But Comfort Matters Too
There’s nothing wrong with guys taking a relaxed approach when they’re single. And there’s nothing wrong with stepping up their grooming game when dating. But the key is balance—it’s important to look good and feel good, whether single or in a relationship.
At the end of the day, whether a guy is single or taken, confidence and personality matter most. But let’s be honest—keeping a well-groomed appearance never hurts!
Our Granddaughter Called Us Stingy Because of Her Wedding Gift from Us
This time, we sent an air fryer to our youngest granddaughter, the cheapest thing on her registry. Eloise called us, livid, accusing us of being cheap. I remember picking up her call and she didn’t even say hi, she just started ranting, “Seriously, Grandma? I just got your gift. An air fryer? That’s the cheapest thing you could find on my registry!”
I was taken aback because as much as the air fryer was the cheapest on their registry, I still thought it’d be useful to them, so I told her that. Eloise kept on complaining, “Useful? Come on, you know you can do better than that. Everyone knows you have the money. I just can’t believe you’d be this cheap with me. It’s embarrassing.”
In this heated moment, I told her, “Yes, you’re right. We are cheap, old, and useless. The only thing you DIDN’T know is that the day before the wedding, we were going to gift you a check for $40,000.”
I revealed this in an attempt to explain to Eloise about the cash gift we usually give our grandkids before the wedding but she was so angry at this point, that she wasn’t listening to a thing I said. I speculated that maybe she didn’t believe we would gift her such an amount of money after only buying her an air fryer.
Eventually, she said, “No, it’s clear. You just don’t love me enough to show it. You know how much pressure I’m under with the wedding. And then, this? It’s like you don’t even care,” then she hung up.
Despite my husband and I’s shock at Eloise’s reaction, we then bought her a China set, hoping to appease her, but decided against giving her the $40,000, feeling she hadn’t earned it.
Fast forward to last week. Eloise talked to her brother and found out that we were telling her the truth about the money. After confirming it with her cousins, she, called again, accusing us of discrimination, “I just found out that it’s true you gave the money to everyone else when they got married. Why didn’t I get anything?”
We stood firm, explaining our stance was due to her initial reaction, “We felt after your reaction to the wedding gift, it wasn’t right to go ahead and gift you the money.” Eloise pleaded trying to convince us otherwise, “So, you’re punishing me? Is that it? Because I was upset about an air fryer?”
I was angry that she didn’t even understand what she did wrong. “It wasn’t about the air fryer, Eloise. It was how you spoke to us, the disrespect. That’s not something we expected or can support,” I explained.
Eloise implored us, nearly in tears, “But that’s so unfair! I was stressed, Grandma. Planning a wedding is hard, and I just snapped. I didn’t mean any of it.” I felt like she should have only apologized to us instead of finding excuses to justify her behavior.
However, I told her, “We understand that it’s a stressful time, but actions and words have consequences. We hoped you’d understand the value of family and love over material things.” Full of desperation, Eloise added, “But you don’t understand! Can’t we just forget all this happened? I need that money, Grandma.”
She pleaded, threatened to boycott Christmas, and accused us of cutting her off but we didn’t budge. In the end, I expressed, “We love you very much. This has nothing to do with cutting you off. We just hope you’ll reflect on this and understand why we made our decision.”
Now, Eloise has followed up on her threat and she’s boycotting Christmas. Her mother, who is our daughter-in-law, is siding with her, calling us unreasonable. However, we feel that after all we have done for Eloise, the air fryer gift, shouldn’t have triggered this reaction.
For context, we had already paid for her college, and her parents covered her graduate school and half the wedding. Additionally, she and her husband are financially comfortable and do not desperately need our money.
We’re also not upset with our grandkids for revealing the cash gift since she is among the group of family members who are allowed to know about it. Our reason for sending the air fryer earlier was that we live far away, so we always send our gifts early.
The wedding gift is also separate from the money, which we give with the hope it will be used for something significant, like a home. Now, we feel like the action we took towards Eloise was well deserved and we are not going back on our decisions even if she and her mom threaten to do their worst.
Despite the tumultuous events and Eloise’s refusal to understand our perspective, my husband and I stand by our decision. Love and respect in our family are paramount, and we hoped this situation would be a learning experience for her.
The holidays might be quieter this year with her family’s absence, but our hope is for healing and understanding in the future. Our door and hearts remain open to Eloise, whenever she’s ready to mend fences.
Want more like this? Click here to read about a grandmother who sparked controversy online because she doesn’t bring her grandchildren gifts when she visits.
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