My mother had a clear favorite her entire life, while I was raised by my grandparents mostly. When she got old and sick, I helped financially but refused to do more than that for a crucial reason.
While most good parents would tell you that they don’t have a favorite, my mother was not ashamed to tell me that my brother, Stanley, was her golden boy. My father walked out of our family because caring for two children became too much.
In the end, my mother blamed me for it. “He wouldn’t have left if I hadn’t gotten pregnant with you,” she told me one day. I was just a child at the time and only wanted my mother’s love.
“But that’s not my fault,” I replied. “I didn’t ask to be born.”
“Don’t talk back to me! I’m the parent, and you’re the kid, so shut up,” she finished. We would have similar conversations through the years whenever she was mad at me. Finally, my mother sent me to live with my paternal grandparents.
They felt so bad that our father had walked away from our lives that they took me in and gave me all the love I never received at home. That’s how I learned that the word family has lots of meanings.
All I heard about my mother and brother over the years was that she helped him with everything. He got into some trouble with the police, and my mother paid all his legal fees. Eventually, she had to sell her house and pay for his apartment.
Stanley was spoiled and couldn’t hold down a job, but my mother coddled him. Meanwhile, my grandparents didn’t have much money, but they gave me everything they could. I had to work to afford my college and my home.
I learned a whole ton of responsibility, and when I graduated, I got a pretty decent job. That’s where I met my husband, Lawrence. We had two daughters whom I cherished equally. When my grandparents got sick, I was there for them until the very end.
They gave me their house, and one of my daughters moved there when she got married. Unfortunately, my husband died shortly after her wedding. She asked me to live with her, but I wanted to stay in our home.
I didn’t hear from my brother or my mother for many years. They didn’t care about me at all, so why should I care about them? But one day, Stanley called. “Hello?” I answered the phone.
“Hey, Brooke. It’s Stanley. How are you?” my brother said through the other line.
“Oh, hey, Stanley. Long time, no speak. I’m fine. How about you?” I replied.
“Yeah, it’s been a while. Listen, I’m calling because Mom broke her hip. I need your help,” Stanley continued.
“Oh, that’s too bad. Is she ok?” I asked.
“She’s fine. It’s just that the hospital bill will be pretty expensive, and I need help paying for it. She’s our mother after all,” he explained.
“Oh, well. Ok. Give me the details, and I’ll send some money,” I told him. My husband and I had accumulated decent savings, so I could afford to send Stanley some money for whatever our mother needed.
“That’s great, Brooke. Thank you. I’ll talk to you later,” Stanley said and hung up. I didn’t feel any obligation to my mother, but I wasn’t heartless. I sent him the money and forgot about it until a week later when my brother called again.
“Hey, Brooke!” Stanley started.
“Hey. How did everything go?” I asked.
“The operation for her hip went well, but the doctor just told me she’s going to need tons of rehab and round-the-clock care. I was wondering when you could come to pick her up?” my brother asked.
“What do you mean pick her up?” I probed, confused.
“I told you. She needs someone to take care of her. I’ve been by her side our whole lives. It’s time you take responsibility, Brooke. I can’t watch her,” Stanley added.
“Excuse me? Responsibility? Mom sent me to live with our grandparents because she hated me, and you were her golden boy. She essentially abandoned me,” I snapped.
“Please. Stop the melodrama. You need to step up because she needs you. She gave you life. You owe her,” Stanley demanded.
“No. I don’t owe her anything. I needed my mother when I was growing up, and she refused. She gave all her love to you, so you will need to figure out something. I gave you money for her hospital bills out of the goodness of my heart, but I won’t be her caretaker,” I told him.
“YOU’RE HORRIBLE, BROOKE! HOW CAN YOU DO THIS? I CAN’T WATCH HER!” Stanley started screaming through the phone.
“Honestly, I don’t care, Stanley. You don’t get to call me horrible. I was a kid when she abandoned me, and my grandparents became my REAL PARENTS. Don’t call me again!” I finished and hung up the call.
Stanley tried calling, texting, e-mailing, and more for several days, but I blocked him. He also tried contacting my daughters, but they refused to listen to him. They knew my history with that side of the family.
Of course, Stanley and my mother bad-mouthed me to anyone who would listen. I have been severely judged for my decision, but I didn’t listen to their criticism. After all, no one ever judged my mother for what she did to me.
What can we learn from this story?
- Caring for your loved ones is important. While Brooke’s choice is controversial, it’s easy to understand her point of view, given her background.
- Forgiveness is divine. Sometimes, you have to be the bigger person. Caring for your parents when they’re old is a big duty, both financially and emotionally. Someone has to do it.
Share this story with your friends. It might brighten their day and inspire them.
If you enjoyed this story, you might like this one about a mother who left her disabled daughter at an orphanage.
Céline Dion Shares Raw Video of Stiff-Person Syndrome Crisis in Never-Seen Footage from New Documentary
In a devastating moment from “I Am: Céline Dion,” the famous person battles through an unexpected and horrifying SPS episode.
Fans are getting an unheard-of glimpse inside Céline Dion’s tribulations during the last few years of her life.
After being diagnosed with stiff-person syndrome in August 2022, the 56-year-old superstar tentatively but proudly returns to the recording studio in a devastating sequence towards the end of her new documentary, I Am: Céline Dion (available for streaming globally on Prime Video).
Shortly after, as part of her continuous treatment regimen, she makes her way to physical therapy and her foot starts to hurt.
Dion’s body locks up, indicating that she is in severe agony while her care team gives her a diazepam nasal spray during the SPS crisis episode. One of her teammates says, “We’ll do a 9-1-1 if she goes back into a spasm.”
In the movie, Dion subsequently remarks, “Every time something like this happens, it makes you feel so embarrassed.” “I’m not sure how to say it. You know that you dislike losing control of yourself?
The five-time Grammy winner thought back on the horrifying moment that director Irene Taylor’s crew captured on camera during her PEOPLE cover interview.
“Overstimulation—whether it be happiness, sadness, sound, or a surprise—can put me into a crisis—that’s one part of the [SPS] condition,” Dion explains, adding that she “did not see” the crisis episode coming that day. “Before something triggered, I was fine.”
Taylor’s understanding of the condition deepened when she was “two feet away” from Dion during the crisis.
Taylor remarks, “That was really amazing, not just for Céline to go through it, but for me to see as well.” “I continued to film because that is how I work, and I thought we would decide later whether or not to incorporate that into the movie.”
Dion and Taylor had developed a close relationship by the time the movie was in post-production, and according to Taylor, “I knew that putting it in the film was really not a risk because she believed in me at that point.” “I really can only thank her for that because she is an open book, was there, and didn’t hold anything back.”
Dion is attempting to humanize the uncommon illness through the movie and contribute to fund-raising efforts for scientific studies in the pursuit of a solution.
Neuropathy has a very broad spectrum. For this reason, I’m making a lot of effort to raise money so that people can speak with their husbands, friends, or neighbors about it,” Dion explains.
Adds Dr. Amanda Piquet, the doctor who diagnosed Dion and director of the University of Colorado Anschutz Medical Campus’s program on autoimmune neurology: “There are many exciting things in store for SPS, and the future looks bright.”
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