In blended families, it’s common for parents to have differing views on how to handle their children. Colleen’s husband continues to provide financial support to his 19-year-old daughter, who is pregnant and already a mother of two. Meanwhile, Colleen feels that her stepdaughter should not be coddled and needs to learn to take responsibility for her actions. This clash in parenting styles led to a situation that went terribly wrong, and Colleen has shared her story with us.
Here is Colleen’s letter:
Hi Colleen! Thank you for sharing your story with us. We’ve prepared 4 pieces of advice that we believe can help you.
Seek mediation or couples counseling.
Given the emotional and financial conflicts, involving a neutral third party could help. A mediator or counselor can facilitate a discussion between you and your husband to address the underlying issues.
This professional might help clarify each other’s perspectives, restore communication, and find a resolution that acknowledges both your concerns and your husband’s responsibilities.
Reevaluate financial decisions and transparency.
Consider discussing the financial decisions and future planning openly with your husband. Since you drained the shared savings account without his consent, it’s crucial to establish a clear, mutually agreed-upon approach to handling finances moving forward.
This might involve setting up separate accounts for personal expenditures and jointly managed accounts for shared expenses, ensuring that both parties are informed and agree on financial decisions.
Engage in a direct conversation with your stepdaughter.
It may be beneficial to address the situation directly with your stepdaughter. An honest conversation about her expectations and how her actions have impacted your relationship with her father could help clear misunderstandings.
Express your intentions and concerns, and listen to her perspective to potentially reach a better understanding and find common ground.
Consider moving out temporarily for reflection.
If the tension remains high and communication isn’t improving, temporarily moving out might provide space for both you and your husband to reflect on the situation. This physical distance could give you time to think about your relationship and future steps without the constant emotional strain.
Use this time to assess what you both need and whether there’s a path forward that respects both your needs and your husband’s.
Another stepmom dealing with tension is Claudia. When her 32-year-old stepdaughter lost her job and decided to move back in with her father, Claudia insisted that she pay rent. This decision led to an unexpected turn of events, and she reached out to us for advice. Read her story here.
My Stepmom Told Me to Wash Dishes After Her Birthday Party Because I Didn’t Gift Her a Dishwasher – Karma Hit back for Her Audacity
When Mia’s stepmother, Trudy, plans an elaborate party for her 45th birthday, Mia has no choice but to do as she is told, including being a hidden helper throughout the festivities. But lucky for Mia, karma seems to be on her side, ready to teach Trudy a lesson.
Grab some popcorn, folks, because this story is one of those moments when the universe steps in and delivers a cosmic smackdown right when you least expect it.
Let me introduce you to the key players of the story:
A smiling teenage girl | Source: Midjourney
I’m Mia. I’m sixteen years old and stuck in a suburban home with my dad and stepmom, Trudy. Trudy’s been around for about two years, and, oh boy, does she have the “wicked stepmother” act down perfectly.
If you looked up “entitled” in the dictionary, I’m pretty sure you’d find her picture staring back at you.
Life with her has felt like living inside a bad reality show, but no one is filming, and definitely not paying me for my trouble.
A close up of an older woman | Source: Midjourney
Dad stays out of the way as much as he can. He’s the “happy wife, happy life” type of man, except that Trudy’s never really happy. She’s the type who expects the world to fall at her feet and cater to her every whim.
Now, let’s talk about last Saturday, the day of Trudy’s birthday party. It was so over-the-top that, honestly, it could have been a wedding reception.
It was her 45th birthday, and Trudy was trying to hold on to her youth in any way she could. In the week leading up to the party, she strutted around the house like some kind of queen.
A smiling older man | Source: Midjourney
“You’d better get me something special this year, Mia,” she said when she came into the kitchen as I was cutting up fruit for my morning smoothie. “A dishwasher would be nice. After all, I’ve done a lot for you.”
Yeah, sure. Good old Trudy. She’s done a lot for me… if you count bossing me around like I’m some sort of Cinderella knockoff.
A close up of a smoothie | Source: Midjourney
“Uh, Trudy,” I said, adding yogurt to the blender, “I’m kind of saving for my prom dress.”
I already knew where this conversation was going.
Her face twisted into this weird look, like she couldn’t believe I just said that.
“Your prom dress?” she scoffed. “Mia, that’s ridiculous! You can just buy something from one of the clothing stores. Something cheap. A dishwasher is much more practical. I don’t want to hear any more excuses.”
A woman standing in a kitchen | Source: Midjourney
Excuses? I was floored. This woman really expected me to drop all my savings on an appliance just because she “deserved” it. Like, where’s my fairy godmother when I need her?
And anyway, Trudy was the one who convinced my dad that I was too young to get an after-school or weekend job.
“Mia can only babysit kids on this street,” Trudy told my dad one night at dinner. “She’ll be safe and only a few houses away from home. And anyway, it’s not like she needs that much money.”
A woman sitting at a dinner table | Source: Midjourney
So, all my prom dress savings? They were from babysitting jobs that I had taken over the past year.
They wouldn’t even cover a tiny dishwasher, let alone the dress I wanted. But I was determined to still find something that I loved.
Fast forward to the day of Trudy’s 45th birthday. The house was buzzing with caterers, an event planner ran around with a clipboard, and enough floral arrangements to rival a garden center.
An outdoor birthday party setting | Source: Midjourney
Meanwhile, I was in the background, wiping down mirrors, setting up drink stations, and generally trying to avoid all eye contact.
“Jeez,” I said to myself, “are the Royal Family coming over?”
I set up the gin station and tried to leave for my room, hoping that I would make myself presentable before Trudy’s posse of friends showed up.
A gin station | Source: Midjourney
As soon as the guests arrived, Trudy transformed into some kind of celebrity. She walked around, tossing fake smiles and soaking up compliments like she was at the Oscars or something.
“Mia! Can you refill the drinks? My guests are thirsty!” she barked from the marquee outside.
Of course, I had no choice but to do so. I couldn’t say no. Not with so many people around. Trudy would probably implode.
A woman wearing a gold dress | Source: Midjourney
I did as I was told, floating around like the invisible Cinderella. I was counting down the minutes until we lit the candles on the elaborate cake and the whole day would just dwindle into nothing.
I hid away for a few moments, finally able to get my hands on some food. At least Trudy loved her food, and she had told the caterers that she wanted elaborate meals.
“You’re hiding here, kiddo?” my dad chuckled when he caught me eating a portion of lobster mac and cheese.
A bowl of lobster mac and cheese | Source: Midjourney
“I’m starving, Dad,” I said, eating another forkful of food. “And everyone is eating anyway.”
“Take some time off, Mimi,” he said. “Eat. I’ll bring you one of those fancy milkshakes from the milkshake station.”
Soon after, it was time for the cake. My dad lit the candles while Trudy beamed like a Cheshire cat and did a little dance.
A gold and white cake | Source: Midjourney
Everyone sang for her at the top of their voices, and Trudy blew out the candles. As the party was winding down, she clinked her fork against her wine glass and fixed me with that awful, expectant glare of hers.
“Mia, since you didn’t bother to buy me a dishwasher for my birthday, the least you could do is wash all these dishes. It’s only fair.”
I stood there, stunned for a second. Everyone went quiet. Twenty pairs of eyes stared at me like I was the villain in this scenario.
She really said it. Out loud. In front of all her friends.
A smug woman in a gold dress | Source: Midjourney
“You didn’t get your mom a birthday present?” one of Trudy’s friends, Alexis, said. “That’s just… rude. And sad.”
My throat tightened, but I managed to keep my voice calm.
“Trudy, I told you, I didn’t have the money. Especially for a dishwasher. I’ve been saving for prom.”
She waved her hand like I was talking nonsense.
An upset teenage girl | Source: Midjourney
“Just wash the dishes, Mia,” she said. “Do something useful for once.”
I could have screamed. But instead, I swallowed my pride and nodded.
“Fine. I’ll get changed and started on them,” I said.
I spent the next hour elbow-deep in soapy water, scrubbing until my fingers went numb. I wanted to cry, but instead, I just scrubbed harder, imagining the day I’d finally escape this madhouse.
A teenager washing dishes | Source: Midjourney
By the time I finished, the party was over, and Trudy’s friends were long gone. I dragged myself to bed, emotionally drained.
The next morning, I woke up to the sound of Trudy’s shriek coming from the kitchen. I thought maybe one of her fancy new gadgets broke. She had just bought herself a lavish new coffee machine that looked like it belonged in a coffee shop.
A coffee machine | Source: Midjourney
But when I walked into the kitchen, I found her standing in the middle of a disaster zone.
The kitchen was trashed.
The smell of burnt plastic filled the air, and the floor was flooded.
“Mia!” she screamed when she saw me. “Look at what happened!”
A flooded kitchen | Source: Midjourney
I blinked, still half-asleep.
“What… what is going on?”
“The pipes!” she shrieked, flailing her arms. “Oh, my kitchen is ruined! This is going to cost a fortune to fix!”
“But everything was fine last night when I went to bed. What happened here?”
My dad stuck his head into the kitchen.
An annoyed woman | Source: Midjourney
“Trudy, did you really drop all the meat oils into the sink last night?” my dad asked.
“I did!” she said. “I didn’t know where else to throw it out. And the caterers left without taking it. But I did throw some drain cleaner down the sink, too.”
“Oh, Trudy! You’re not supposed to do that! Now look! You messed this up! I told you to just pour out a kettle of boiling water.”
Oil being poured in a sink | Source: Midjourney
My first instinct was to laugh. I know I shouldn’t have, but come on. After everything? Didn’t it just seem like karma played a part in this, too?
While Trudy was losing her mind, I couldn’t help but feel a tiny smirk tugging at my lips. I didn’t say a word.
For the next week, the kitchen was completely out of commission. My dad, bless his heart, tried to soothe her, but the damage was done. The cost of the repairs was so high that Dad announced that they’d have to cut back on expenses.
An annoyed woman | Source: Midjourney
“Except for Mia,” he said. “I have $500 for her prom dress.”
“You can’t be serious, David!” Trudy hissed. “You want me to pay for the new kitchen tiles, but you can spoil Mia?”
“You spoiled yourself for your party. I can spoil my child for her prom.”
A smiling man | Source: Midjourney
And that was how Trudy learned not to cross my dad. But she did change her tune a bit. She allowed me to get my part-time job, and she tried to actually mend things with me.
“I’ll come with you when you go looking for your dress, Mia,” she said.
Do you think it will last?
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