At 82, Everly faced discrimination when she was told she was “too old” and dressed “inappropriately” for a trendy restaurant. In response, she made a Facebook post that went viral, sparking outrage and calls for change.
My name is Everly, and I love trying new things, even at my age. One Thursday morning, my daughter Nancy surprised me with a visit to my garden shop. She suggested, “Mom, let’s try that new restaurant downtown!” Her excitement made me eager to go.
We both dressed simply; I wore a floral blouse and khaki pants, and Nancy was in jeans and a T-shirt. For us, it was about spending time together, not how we looked.
As we drove to the restaurant, we talked about how excited we were to make new memories. But our simple outing took an unexpected turn.
When we entered the restaurant, we were greeted by loud music and chatter. The place was lively, filled with a younger crowd who were stylishly dressed, making us feel out of place. Still, we didn’t mind; we were there to enjoy ourselves.
However, as we stepped inside, I noticed the host looking us over. His smile faded for a moment before he led us to a table by the window. It was a nice spot, but our experience quickly changed.
A young waiter came over, and while he initially seemed polite, his attitude shifted as he noticed our appearance. “I’m sorry,” he said, sounding less than sincere, “but this place might not be suitable for you.” His words stung.
He continued, “You seem too old for our usual clientele, and your outfits aren’t appropriate for the vibe here.” Nancy turned red with anger, and I felt a deep sadness at being judged for my age and how I looked.
The waiter wasn’t done. He said we had to leave “so as not to spoil the appetite of our guests.” Before we could respond, he signaled two bodyguards who came to escort us out.
The embarrassment was overwhelming. I felt the eyes of other customers on us as Nancy squeezed my hand tightly. We quietly left, feeling hurt and rejected.
Outside, Nancy was furious. She took out her phone and snapped photos of the bodyguards. “We need to share this, Mom. People should know how they treat others,” she insisted.
Later, in her kitchen, we posted the pictures on Facebook. Nancy shared our story, highlighting how we were judged unfairly because of our age and appearance. She tagged the restaurant and asked her friends to spread the word.
The post quickly went viral, with thousands of shares and comments. People expressed their shock and shared their own experiences with ageism. The restaurant’s ratings plummeted as customers voiced their disapproval.
Amid the uproar, Mr. Thompson, the restaurant owner, reached out to me. He was shocked and apologetic about the incident. “Mrs. Everly, I’m so sorry. I had no idea this happened,” he said, revealing that the waiter was his son.
He invited me back for a complimentary meal and offered a personal apology. I appreciated his honesty but told him, “It’s not just about a meal. It’s about how people are treated.”
Mr. Thompson agreed and said he had talked to his son about respect for all customers, regardless of their age or attire. He emphasized that his son would not inherit anything until he understood these values.
Our conversation was hopeful. It showed a willingness to make amends and recognize the need for change. As we ended the call, I felt validated yet still aware of the larger issue of ageism.
A week later, I dressed in my best silk dress—a deep blue that highlighted my eyes. I was ready to return to the restaurant, not as a victim, but as a woman who deserves respect.
Entering the restaurant again, the door chimes felt louder this time. The atmosphere was the same, but I felt empowered. Mr. Thompson welcomed me with a warm smile and took me to a lovely table by the window.
The waiter, Mr. Thompson’s son, approached me with hesitation. “Mrs. Everly, I’m very sorry for how I treated you last time. It was unkind,” he stammered, looking genuinely remorseful.
His apology seemed sincere, and Mr. Thompson added, “My son and I have discussed this situation. I made it clear that we must respect all customers, no matter their age or how they dress. He will not be part of this business if he doesn’t embrace those values.”
Satisfied with their commitment to change, I enjoyed my meal. It tasted wonderful and felt like a celebration of respect and understanding.
After returning home, I posted an update on Facebook. I shared photos of the meal and the apologies I received. “Change is possible,” I wrote, “when we stand against injustice and those in the wrong are willing to listen and learn.”
Reflecting on this experience, I realized the power of one voice amplified by social media. It was about more than just a meal or an apology. It was a reminder that everyone deserves respect, regardless of age or appearance. This ordeal showed me the strength of my voice and the importance of standing up for my values.
As I reflected on the entire experience, I felt a sense of empowerment. This journey taught me that standing up for myself and others can lead to meaningful change. The response from the community reminded me that many people share the same struggles and that we must support one another in the fight against ageism and discrimination.
I continued to receive messages of support from friends and even strangers who appreciated my story. It was heartwarming to see how a single act of injustice could spark conversations about respect and dignity for everyone, regardless of age.
In the weeks that followed, I became more active in my community, attending local meetings and advocating for inclusivity. I wanted to ensure that no one else would face the same humiliation I did. I also kept in touch with Mr. Thompson and his son, encouraging them to foster a culture of respect in their restaurant.
Through this ordeal, I learned that our voices can make a difference, and our experiences, no matter how painful, can lead to positive change. I felt grateful for my daughter Nancy, who stood by my side and took action when it mattered most. Together, we had turned a hurtful moment into a powerful opportunity for growth and understanding.
As I walked through my garden one sunny afternoon, I smiled, knowing that I had turned a painful experience into a catalyst for change. I looked forward to more adventures with my family, always reminding myself that age is just a number and that everyone deserves to be treated with kindness and respect.
What Men’s Beauty Standards Look Like in Different Countries
The mainstream definition of what an ideal man should look like varies from country to country. Just like women, a lot of men try to follow common beauty trends in order to be seen as more attractive. The cultural difference in what exactly people consider objectively beautiful might come as a surprise.
Bright Side did a fun bit of research about what people consider to be the ideal male beauty standard in many countries around the world. Looking at the most beloved male celebs will tell you about what is considered attractive.
1. United States and Canada
According to People’s magazine, the most attractive men in the US for the past 3 years are Paul Rudd (Ant-Man), Michael B. Jordan (Black Panther), and singer John Legend.
The usual definition of beauty, when it comes to men in the United States and Canada, is having a muscular physique, ruggedness, and golden skin. However, in the past couple of years, especially among the younger generation, an androgynous look has become more desirable.
2. India
According to the poll, the most attractive men in India are actors Shah Rukh Khan (Don 2), Aamir Khan (Like Stars on Earth), and Hrithik Roshan (Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara). Even though Shah Rukh Khan took first place, he actually opened up, saying that he has been called “ugly and unconventional” in the past.
The main beauty standard in India is having a lighter skin tone, which gets promoted a lot on TV. Other than that, Indian standards are pretty close to American: tall, muscular man, who have clear skin and a full head of hair.
3. United Kingdom
According to a 2021 poll, the most attractive man in the UK is Tom Hardy (Inception), and 2022 research suggests that Richard Madden (Game of Thrones) has a huge shot of winning that title.
The research data says that the ideal type of man for British people has an athletic build, brown eyes, short dark-brown hair, and some facial hair. In fact, men with beards are found to be over 60% more attractive than men without them.
4. Philippines
The most attractive men in the Philippines have been noted as Josh Cullen Santos from the boy group SB19 and the actor Alden Richards (Imagine You & Me).
The beauty standard in the Philippines has shifted and instead of looking macho, the men care about their appearance a lot and go for a more beautiful look, so they go to salons to get facials. Other standards include having dark hair, being at least 5’9“, and having a more “mestizo” look, which means being mixed with white.
5. South Korea
While western countries prefer men who are athletically built, South Korea likes more of a skinny, androgynous-looking body (not too skinny, fat, or muscular) for men. Men need to be a little bit soft, with slim facial features, double eyelids, and lighter skin.
Male celebrities in South Korea also do not shy away from using makeup or dyeing their hair, actors dye it black to look more youthful while idols dye it “fun” colors, and it is not considered to be revolutionary like it would be in the US.
6. Mexico
Mexicans go for a more “macho” look, which means being extremely masculine, as opposed to South Korea which prefers a more androgynous look. The list of the most attractive men includes actors Diego Boneta (Luis Miguel) and Ryan Guzman (9-1-1) in the first 2 spots.
7. Germany
According to research, German women prefer their men to be taller, with either black or brown short hair. The largest percent of the respondents said that they would like their man to be muscular, but skinny men took a close second place.
Football player Marco Reus and the actor Thore Schölermann have been named the most attractive men.
8. Italy
In Italy, men being overly masculine does not have much importance in terms of their attractiveness. In fact, a lot of men are into grooming and styling their body hair, and Italian men do not shy away from wearing “girlish” colors, like pink or purple.
The most attractive male celebrities are considered to be Raoul Bova and Giulio Berruti.
9. Australia
Australian male beauty standards are focused on physical size and being muscular. While women perceive their bodies as heavier than ideal, men who follow beauty standards, on the contrary, think they are too skinny. The Hemsworth brothers are considered one of the ideals of Australian beauty.
10. The Netherlands
The Netherlands is considered to be a country that has the tallest people in the world, with the average height of a woman being 5’7″ (around 170 cm), and 6’0″ (around 183 cm) for men. Dutch women seek a male partner that is taller than them.
TV presenter Arie Boomsma and actor Michiel Huisman have been named 2 of the most attractive Dutch men, and their heights match up the beauty standard: Boomsma is 6’5 (around 198 cm), while Peelen is 6’1 (around 185 cm). Notably, both men are also muscular and have facial hair.
Which country’s standards align with your own? Do you think standards are hurtful for people’s self-esteem?
Leave a Reply