My house used to be spotless when it was me and my husband. But then his friend came to stay and fights and clashes began. My husband didn’t care how I felt or about the distress I shared. It all finally came right when I took matters into my own hands.
When my husband offered his friend sanctuary at our home, he did it without my consent. Little did I know that having his longterm pal there would become a nightmare. Circumstances pushed me to take drastic measures to remedy things.
A dirty and messy bedroom | Source: Pexels
This is a photo of the bedroom after my husband’s best friend, Alex, had been staying with us for a few weeks. I cannot describe the smell to you, but believe me, it is putrid and unbearable! Alex moved in with us because his house was undergoing major renovations.
To be honest, my husband invited his friend to come live with us without discussing it with me first. I wasn’t happy with this arrangement, asking, “How long will he be here? And why didn’t you talk to me first before making such a drastic decision?”
A couple having a serious conversation | Source: Pexels
“I am sorry, love. I wasn’t thinking straight. I allowed my excitement to control me,” he explained. The poor thing looked sincere in his apology, so I relented. But little did I know that would be a big mistake on MY part.
Initially, it was supposed to be a short-term arrangement, but weeks turned into months. My husband, Jake, thought it would be fun to have his best friend around. But he didn’t consider the extra work it would create for me.
A frustrated woman sitting next to someone | Source: Pexels
“Don’t worry, babe,” Jake said the day Alex arrived, carrying his duffel bag and a box of video games. “It’ll be like old times. We’ll have a blast!” He also vowed that they’d stay out of my way and wouldn’t be a nuisance.
I forced a smile, but inside, I was already dreading the mess and the idea of living with two men. Jake and Alex had been inseparable since college, bonded by their love for gaming and sports. I, on the other hand, liked my peace and order.
A happy man carrying a duffel bag while his friend follows behind | Source: Midjourney
Within days, the house transformed, and NOT in a good way! Empty beer bottles littered the living room, snack wrappers were everywhere, and dirty laundry piled up in Alex’s room! Jake and Alex would stay up late.
All they did since our guest came to stay was play video games or drink beer together. Their laughter echoed through the house, while I tried to sleep with a pillow over my head. I was so overwhelmed by all the extra cleaning I had to do.
An upset woman sitting on a windowsill | Source: Pexels
And to add to that, I was starting to feel increasingly lonely. One evening, after a particularly long day at work, I found the kitchen in shambles. Crumbs covered the counter, the sink was full of dirty dishes, and a mysterious sticky substance featured on the floor.
I couldn’t take it anymore! “This has to STOP!” I said to myself through clenched teeth and balled-up fists. I decided to tackle my issues with Alex alone with my husband. But, he and his friend were glued at the hip and it was hard to get Jake by himself.
A dirty kitchen with used plates, glasses, and mugs | Source: Pexels
When I finally got a small gap where my husband was by himself, I decided to confront him. “Jake, can we talk?” I called from the doorway of his home office, where he was immersed in work while Alex was knee-deep in another video game in the living room.
“Sure, babe. What’s up?” he said, not looking away from the laptop screen. “I can’t keep up with all the cleaning. I need some help around here.” Jake paused what he was doing and turned to me with a dismissive wave.
A man working on a laptop in his home office | Source: Pexels
I must say, I didn’t expect the response I got from him and it really hurt. Brushing my concerns off he replied, “Oh, don’t be such a downer! You just can’t stand that everything is not about you. Besides, it’s only one more room to clean. It’s not a big deal.”
His words stung! I was about to say something back to him when I noticed he’d gone back to his work! He wasn’t acknowledging my presence anymore! I walked away, feeling both angry and hurt. That night, I lay awake, listening to the childhood friends having a great time!
Two men sitting on the floor eating burgers while playing video games | Source: Pexels
Then and there I started planning my next move. I decided to show Jake what “not a big deal” really meant. I figured he needed to experience it firsthand. The next morning, I woke up early and gathered all of Alex’s trash.
Since they slept late, they were going to wake up much later than me. I picked up the empty cans, dirty clothes, and half-eaten food and dumped them all in Jake’s office. By the time they woke up, the room looked like a war zone!
A woman holding a full trash bag | Source: Pexels
“Hey, what the hell?” my husband shouted from his office as soon as he opened the door. I knew throwing all the trash in there would have the most impact since Jake worked from home. He needed that space to be functional.
I didn’t bother responding or attending to him since I knew why he was shouting. Instead, Alex popped in and laughed, “Whoa, bro! Your office is a mess! You should do something about that if you want to get any work done.”
A shocked man standing in a dirty room | Source: Midjourney
Off he went to prepare some breakfast and get back on the couch! Jake didn’t confront me but pushed everything into one corner so he could enter and work. As the days progressed, dirty dishes, random socks, and leftover food piled up in my husband’s office, causing him to freak out.
“I can’t work like THIS!!!” he shouted for the whole house to hear. I walked in with a sweet smile. “It’s only one room to clean, Jake, so do it. Not a big deal, right?” My husband was FURIOUS, but he couldn’t argue with my logic. Alex, on the other hand, looked sheepish.
A frustrated man | Source: Pexels
“Dude, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize it was that bad,” he mumbled. “Maybe you should help out more,” I suggested and left them to deal with the mess. For a few days, things improved. Jake and Alex tried to keep the house cleaner, but their efforts were half-hearted at best.
The mess crept back, and I felt my frustration rising again. One Friday evening, I couldn’t take it anymore and confronted Jake. We got into a huge fight where he accused me of being a party pooper. Alex even tried mediating, but since he was the main cause of our stress, I told him to stay out of it.
A couple arguing | Source: Freepik
My husband tried defending his friend but that made me angrier. I decided I’d had ENOUGH! I packed a bag and called my best friend, Lisa. “Can I crash at your place for the weekend?” I asked. “Of course, hon. What’s going on?” she replied.
A man watching as his partner leaves their apartment with a bag | Source: Pexels
I explained the situation, and she welcomed me with open arms. That weekend, I enjoyed the calm and cleanliness of Lisa’s apartment. I didn’t have to pick up after anyone, and it was a much-needed break.
An emotional woman being comforted by a friend | Source: Pexels
On Monday morning, my phone buzzed with a call from Jake. “Please come home,” he begged, all desperate and ashamed. “The house is a disaster, and I can’t find anything I need. Alex is impossible to live with!” This man had a nerve calling me after going silent the whole weekend.
But I still felt a pang of sympathy, yet I stayed firm. “I’ll come back when the house is clean, and Alex is gone.” Jake sighed. “Okay, okay. We’ll clean it up immediately. Just please come home today, my love?”
A man talking on the phone in a dirty home office | Source: Midjourney
“I’ll think about it,” I replied, not wanting to commit to anything and make him think he’d won. To my surprise, within minutes he sent me a video of them tidying up the house. I chose not to reply to the message but after discussing the matter with Lisa, I decided to go back home.
Two men cleaning a filthy house | Source: Midjourney
I returned later that day to find the house SPOTLESS! Jake and Alex had scrubbed every inch, and my husband’s friend had packed his bags. “Thanks for the hospitality,” he said sheepishly. “I’ll find somewhere else to stay until the renovations are done.”
A man carrying his luggage bag | Source: Freepik
As Alex left, Jake pulled me into a hug. “I’m sorry, babe. I didn’t realize how much work it was. I should have listened to you.” I softened, seeing the genuine regret in his eyes. “It’s okay. I just need us to be a team, not you and Alex against me.”
From that day on, things improved. Jake made an effort to keep the house clean and helped out more. Our home became a place of peace again, and our relationship grew stronger.
A woman hugging her man while he prepares breakfast | Source: Pexels
This is a photo of the extra bedroom after my husband’s best friend stayed with us for a few months. I cannot describe the smell to you, but believe me, it is blissful! Now the torment of having Alex over is just a memory of a lesson learned.
Jake smiled, wrapping his arm around me. “And one we won’t forget.”
A clean bedroom | Source: Pexels
Life returned to normal, but the experience brought us closer. We learned the importance of communication and respecting each other’s space. And I knew that no matter what challenges came our way, we could face them together.
A happy couple hanging out on a windowsill | Source: Pexels
In the following story, a frugal husband needs to learn a valuable lesson after trying to save by collecting food from food banks. His wife got the food bank’s director involved and cunningly they taught him why the poor need such services.
Marlo Thomas Confesses Her Love for Phil Donahue
Marlo Thomas and Phil Donahue actually wrote the marital handbook.
The long-married couple’s book, What Makes a Marriage Last: Insider Stories, contains personal facts about their marriage. Forty Well-Known Couples Share Their Secrets with Us.
The most fascinating revelation made by Marlo is that, even though she and Phil have been married for over 40 years, she never really wanted to get married.
The famous person expressed in the book her previously negative opinion of the institution, saying that marriage is like a vacuum cleaner that sucks away all of your ambition and vitality when you stick it to your ear.
Thomas frequently shares her opinions, likening marriage to having to placate a prisoner. That is, until she met Donahue.
Phil Donahue and Marlo Thomas met following the dissolution of their first marriage, and they have remained lifelong friends ever since.
The Phil Donahue Show, which was eventually renamed as simply “Donahue,” was the vehicle through which Phil Donahue first gained popular recognition. For the first time, audience members participated in the program, which ran for 29 years. One of the visitors on his show who radically changed his life’s trajectory was Marlo Thomas.
The book claims that the two met in 1977 in Chicago, when Phil was bringing four children with him. His fifth child, a daughter, lived somewhere else with her mother and ex-wife.
Marlo and Phil dated for three years before being married in 1980 in front of a small wedding party of thirty-five guests.
Not surprise, Marlo’s friends and family were taken aback by the actress’s sudden change of heart. A hilarious story of Marlo’s bridal shower, where visitors hung notes from the soon-to-be bride that disclosed her past views on marriage, is featured in the couple’s book.
The book claims that Marlo’s mother was the most shocked of all, asking Donahue, “How did you get her to do this?” throughout the nuptials of the pair.
Reportedly, among other emotions, even total strangers voiced shock at the well-known social activist’s decision to get married. While Phil was in the lavatory, a passenger on the airplane the couple took to Greece for their honeymoon expressed displeasure to Marlo, presumably disappointed that she had given up her old independent streak.
In the book, Thomas is honest enough to acknowledge that something was unclear when they spoke. After all her life condemning marriage, was she suddenly a hypocrite for getting married? Had she let those down who held her in high regard as the embodiment of self-reliance?
Even though Donahue and Thomas discuss the usual ups and downs of their long marriage in the book, they manage to make their marriage work to this day. They describe these problems as teaching moments that deepened their relationship.
The couple had been apart from the beginning of their marriage, with Phil traveling to Chicago to tape his show and Marlo traveling to pursue her acting career.
Thomas had a greater understanding of how different individuals define marriage when his aunt said that the couple’s union was void because they weren’t living together exclusively. In spite of their separation, Thomas and Donahue were able to keep their marriage together. Significantly, Marlo’s marriage resulted in her having children.
In a 2012 interview with AARP, Thomas reflected on her experience helping Phil raise his kids, stating she went into it knowing that they already had a traditional mother and that would not be her role.
Rather, Marlo claims that she began to treat Phil’s children more like friends in an effort to mimic the parenting style of her own mother. She continues by saying that she feels more connected to them today than she did at the start of their marriage.
Donahue points out that Thomas really did strive to understand the lads in the book and spent as much time as she could getting to know his sons.
Phil and Marlo believe that their long marriage is a result of her strong bond with his kids and their mutual faith in each other. “You build trust when you realize that this person always has your back,” says Marlo in clarification.
Despite being married for more than 40 years, they still have more memories to make.
Phil goes on to argue that a marriage has to be desired by both parties in order for it to last. Marlo says she would never want to be anything other than married to her lover, echoing his sentiments. She claims that Donahue has assisted her “in every manner possible.”
When two people truly commit to one another, marriage is an incredibly lovely union that is made much more beautiful.
These two have a lot to teach and inspire us all. As satisfying as their relationship is, we should all strive to be in one!
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