Phil Donahue and Marlo Thomas wrote a book about marriage. It’s called “What Makes a Marriage Last: 40 Celebrated Couples Share with Us the Secrets.” In the book, they talk about their own marriage and share secrets from other couples.
Even though Marlo has been married to Phil for more than 40 years, she admits that when she was younger, she didn’t really want to get married.
In the book, Marlo Thomas talks about how she used to think marriage was like a vacuum cleaner that sucks out all your energy and ambition. She felt like living with a jailer you had to please.
But everything changed when she met Phil Donahue. They found each other after Phil’s first marriage ended, and now they have a strong bond that has lasted their whole lives.
Phil Donahue became famous with his TV show, “The Phil Donahue Show,” which later became just “Donahue.” It ran for 29 years and was the first show to let the audience join in. Marlo Thomas was a guest on his show, and meeting her changed Phil’s life.
The couple first met in Chicago in 1977. Phil Donahue already had four boys with him, and his fifth child, a daughter, lived with his ex-wife and her mother in another place.
Marlo and Phil dated for three years before getting married in 1980 in a small ceremony with 35 people.
Marlo’s friends and family were surprised by her decision to get married, given her past views on marriage. The book tells a funny story about friends at Marlo’s bridal shower putting up quotes from her that showed her previous thoughts about marriage.
According to the book, Marlo’s mom was really surprised at their wedding and kept asking Phil, “How did you get her to do this?” Even strangers, like a woman on their honeymoon plane to Greece, were shocked and disappointed that Marlo, who was known for being independent, decided to settle down.
In the book, Marlo admits that this made her doubt her choice. She wondered if she was being hypocritical since she had criticized marriage for so long. She worried that she let down fans who saw her as a symbol of independence.
Despite the challenges, Phil and Marlo make their marriage work. They talk about the ups and downs in the book, saying that those tough times helped strengthen their bond.
In the early days of their marriage, they spent time apart because Phil was taping his show in Chicago, and Marlo was traveling for her acting career. Even though they weren’t always living together, Marlo’s aunt helped her see that marriage can mean different things to different people.
Despite the distance, Marlo and Phil made their marriage successful. And one important thing to note is that Marlo not only gained a husband but also gained children when she got married.
In a 2012 interview with AARP, Marlo Thomas talked about helping to raise Phil’s children. She knew they already had a traditional mother, so she didn’t try to take on that role. Instead, she became more like a friend to Phil’s children, just like her own mother was to her.
Marlo says that her relationship with Phil’s children is even stronger now than when she first married Phil. In the book, Phil emphasizes that Marlo spent a lot of time talking to and trying to understand his sons.
Phil and Marlo think that the key to their long marriage is the trust they have in each other. Marlo says, “You build trust when you realize that this person always has your back.”
Even though they’ve been married for over 40 years, they believe there are still more memories to create together.
Phil says that for a marriage to last, both people have to really want it. Marlo agrees and says that looking back, she wouldn’t have it any other way than being married to Phil. She points out that he has supported her in every possible way.
Marriage is a wonderful connection, especially when two people fully commit to it. This couple is truly inspiring and sets a great example for all of us. We should all aim for a relationship as successful as theirs!
After returning home from my daughter’s funeral, I discovered a tent in my backyard — what I found inside left me in shock
“She was such a light,” someone else added. I nodded, but I couldn’t really hear them.
All I could think of was Lily’s laugh. How her little giggle could fill a room. I’d never hear it again. That thought crushed me more than anything. I wanted to scream, but no sound came out.
As people filtered out, offering their condolences, I just kept staring at the empty chair where Lily should’ve been. My body felt heavy, like I was dragging myself through mud, and my mind kept wandering back to her final days.
“Let me know if you need anything,” a voice said as I walked out of the cemetery. I nodded but didn’t respond. What could anyone do?
The drive home was silent. I couldn’t turn on the radio—music felt wrong, somehow. I just wanted quiet. The kind of quiet where you can pretend the world stopped with your grief.
When I pulled into the driveway, I wasn’t even sure how I got there. I sat in the car for a minute, staring at the house, trying to gather the energy to go inside. I didn’t want to face that empty space. Not without her.
But something stopped me before I could get out.
There, in the backyard, was a tent.
A huge, brightly colored tent. The kind you’d see at a circus. Red and yellow stripes, with little flags fluttering at the top. It didn’t make sense. My heart jumped into my throat.
“What… is that?” I whispered to myself.
I blinked, rubbed my eyes. Maybe I was hallucinating. Grief does strange things to people, right? I was exhausted, emotionally drained. But no, the tent was still there. Bold, bright, and out of place. It was like a splash of color in a black-and-white world.
I got out of the car slowly, my legs feeling like they might give way at any second. Who would put a tent in my yard? And on today, of all days? My head spun with questions. Was this some sort of prank? Or had I completely lost it?
I walked closer, every step feeling heavier than the last. The wind picked up, rustling the colorful flags on top of the tent. My heart pounded so hard I thought it might burst.
“This can’t be real,” I muttered, clenching my fists.
But it was real. As I got closer, I could see the details—the stitching on the fabric, the wooden stakes holding it in place. My mind raced. There was no note, no sign of who had put it there or why.
I reached out, my hand trembling as I touched the flap of the tent. It felt solid, real. My stomach twisted. I didn’t want to open it, but I had to know what was inside.
With a deep breath, I gripped the edge of the flap and pulled it open.
I opened the tent flap slowly, my breath shallow, heart racing. Inside, there was something bundled up in the middle of the space. For a second, my mind couldn’t make sense of it. It was wrapped in a blanket, small and still. My stomach twisted, and I couldn’t stop the flood of memories that hit me all at once.
Lily, lying in the hospital bed. So pale. So fragile. The tubes, the machines. I remember her tiny body swallowed by the blankets, the way she barely moved in those last few days. My knees nearly buckled under the weight of it all.
“No,” I whispered, my voice trembling. “No, not again…”
I took a step forward, my whole body shaking. The sight in front of me felt like another cruel joke, like the world was mocking me. Why today? Why now?
Suddenly, the bundle moved.
I gasped, freezing in place. My heart pounded so loud I could hear it in my ears. For a split second, I didn’t know what to do. My mind spun, expecting the worst, preparing for more pain.
But then, a small head popped out from under the blanket. A tiny, golden retriever puppy, its fur soft and golden like sunlight. It blinked up at me with wide, curious eyes, a pink bow tied around its neck. My breath caught in my throat. I stared, completely overwhelmed.
“What… what are you doing here?” I whispered, my voice cracking.
The puppy wiggled out of the blanket and stumbled toward me, wagging its little tail. It was so full of life, so innocent, a stark contrast to the grief that had consumed me for so long. I knelt down slowly, reaching out to touch the soft fur, still in disbelief. My fingers trembled as they brushed against the puppy’s coat, warm and alive.
Tears welled up in my eyes. “Why is there a puppy here? Who did this?” My voice broke, the confusion mixing with the heavy sadness I had carried all day.
As I stroked the puppy, I noticed something else—an envelope tucked under the blanket. My heart skipped a beat. With shaking hands, I picked it up and stared at it for a moment. The handwriting on the front was familiar. My breath hitched as I recognized it. Lily’s handwriting. Messy, but hers.
Tears blurred my vision as I carefully opened the envelope. Inside was a note, short and simple. My hands shook as I read the words.
“Dear Mommy,
I know you’re sad because I had to go to heaven. But I wanted to leave you something to help you smile again. I asked Daddy to get you a puppy, so you’ll have someone to cuddle with when you’re missing me. Her name is Daisy, and she loves to play! Please take care of her for me. I’ll always be with you, watching from above. I love you so much.
Love, Lily.”
I dropped to my knees, clutching the note to my chest. The tears came in waves, and I couldn’t stop them. I cried harder than I had at the funeral. Harder than I had since the moment I knew I was losing her.
“Lily…” I sobbed, my voice barely a whisper.
Even in her final days, my sweet little girl had been thinking of me. She knew. She knew how much I’d miss her, how much it would hurt. And she found a way to make sure I wouldn’t be alone. A puppy. A new life to care for, to love.
I held Daisy close, the warmth of her little body grounding me in the moment. I could still feel Lily’s presence. The tent, the puppy—it was all part of her last gift to me. A way to remind me that even though she was gone, her love would always be with me.
The tent didn’t feel so strange anymore. It was a place for me to find Daisy, a place to feel connected to Lily one more time.
Over the next few days, Daisy became my shadow. She followed me everywhere, her tiny paws tapping on the floor as she scampered after me. At first, I didn’t know what to do. How could I care for this puppy when my heart was so shattered?
But Daisy didn’t give me much choice. She’d nuzzle into my side when I was curled up on the couch, licking my hand until I smiled through my tears. She’d bounce around with her little pink bow, full of energy and joy, reminding me of the brightness Lily used to bring.
Every morning, I’d sit with my coffee, Daisy at my feet, and I’d think of Lily. I’d imagine her watching over me, her smile still lighting up the sky. And every time Daisy curled up in my lap, I felt a piece of Lily’s love wrapping around me.
Daisy wasn’t a replacement. Nothing could ever replace my Lily. But she was a part of her. A living, breathing reminder of the love Lily left behind. Slowly, day by day, the weight on my chest lightened, just a little.
Taking care of Daisy pulled me out of the fog I’d been in. I had to get up, feed her, play with her. She needed me, just like Lily had known I’d need her.
Lily had given me one final gift: a reason to keep going. And even though the pain of losing her would never fully go away, I knew now that I wasn’t facing it alone.
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